Yuku free message boards

FULL CIRCLE
Current mood: accomplished
Category: Music

I've been longing to blog, but I have been lacking internet Access and sufficient time and energy to sit down and dig in... well tonight's the night, as I just enjoyed a productive and semi relaxing day off here in Lexington, Kentucky. My first time to Kentucky by the way, I did not know what to expect, but it was rather lovely. I wasn't sure what there was to do around here, so after taking care of business for the first part of the day, Ramiele, Syesha and I decided to make our way to our trusty stand by, the mall. Sounds exciting right... well actually it might not have been exciting but we did have a very interesting cab ride on the way to the mall, the driver was quite the character, like straight out of a movie, I wish I could explain but I don't think I can, LOL:) Any who, we got to see how green this place is, lots of trees and very pleasant weather for a summer day!


So we made our way around the mall at a snail's pace, as we often get stopped about every two feet and get asked that familiar question... "Are y'all from American Idol?" It's funny because my appearance is generally not what gives me away, but the not so subtle speaking voice... people ALWAYS say "I recognized your voice". I guess I've never been able to disguise my voice, even when I was a kid I would attempt to trick my friends on the phone and try to pretend to be someone else, and sure enough I would always get "C'mon Brooke, I know it's you". Any way today I decided to give my skin a break and go make-up free and opted for the comfortable flat shoes today (it's my day off) which then usually prompts "you look different" and "you're much smaller than you look on TV"... and then I say "yep:)" which then is almost always followed by "do you mind if we can take a picture" , then usually causing a domino effect, with one picture turning into multiple pictures with every person in the surrounding area with a camera phone, and this is when I am wishing I had at least put on some lip gloss:) Oh well, by now I have given up on trying to look "all dolled up" every time I am about to venture out into the world, after all I am just a normal gal. What someone sees on TV or on the stage is generally the creation of a talented professional. Truth be told, it is a bizarre life these days, as I am reminded everyday that I walk outside the door, 30 million people really do watch this show! Who knows however, how long this new life will last, as the spot light fades with time. I hope for a sustaining career in music, but I think it's safe to say after all this, I have found that I'm not motivated by the fame, but by the music itself. Not to say in any way that I don't find joy in connecting with genuine and sincere fans, I absolutely do!!! Hard to explain...

It was around 3:30 am when we pulled into Philadelphia on our buses and made our way up to the hotel rooms. As I was trying to fall back asleep for a few hours before the day began, I found myself not able to shut down my mind, as usual. As I looked at my iphone, I noticed the date, we are in August of 2008. That is when I had the crazy realization that It was almost exactly a year ago to the date that I had taken that red eye flight alone from Arizona to Philadelphia to embark on a journey that little did I know was going to dramatically change my life. That morning I had a little time and decided to take a walk around the city. I walked passed the quaint hotel that I stayed in during the audition week. I went back to the Anthropologie where I had last year spent quiet time sitting and thinking in a beautiful floral chair anxiously and nervously anticipating what the future would bring. I then made my way past a shoe store that I had noticed a pair of vintage looking boots handcrafted of fine italian leather, except this time I went inside and tried them on... that's when I looked at my watch and realized it was time to check out, grab my bags and make my way to the bus, I went to take off the boots only to find the zipper completely stuck and tangled up in the nylon sock I had on underneath them, I started to panic both in fear of missing the bus, and having to buy the boots, they were awesome, however the were over $500... Long story long, I was able to break free, I made it on the bus, oh and I did not buy the boots:)

We then traveled a short distance to the venue, Wachovia Stadium, my starting place. When we arrived I walked out to the parking lot to meet and greet the fans, the very same parking lot where I stood in line in the darkness of the early morning at 4:30 am. After press and the indoor meet and greet, we were standing on the stage for soundcheck and thats when it really hit me. That night as I was waiting underneath the stage to make my entrance on the piano for my set, I could hear Carly sing "I drove all night", I turned to one of the crew members and said "this is where it all began"... Suddenly I felt a surge of excitement and nervousness to get on that stage and perform. Right after I had finished Let it Be, I turned and pointed to the very top of the stadium in section 221A where I had waited nearly twenty hours for my audition for American Idol, and I said, "and to think that in a years time, I have gone from sitting up there to performing here on this stage, is very surreal"... Truly I felt overwhelmed, and grateful for this unbelievable experience that had in fact come FULL CIRCLE !! Wow, I've said it before, and it won't be the last time, I can't believe that I have come this far, that I have been blessed with such an opportunity! It has been a journey both amazing and challenging... I am thankful to all who helped me to make it possible. There are still somedays that I find myself unsure of my own abilities to arise to the challenges that come with fulfilling your dreams, but I am filled with gratitude for faith, family, friends and fans that provide me with strength and the support that I need to keep on moving! Thank you, Thank you, Thank you...

And the journey continues, but as for now, it is time to go to bed... Goodnight!!!