To all of you who do not know me, I am the King of Sucks, a valuable suckster who comes here shortly after the survivor season has ended to spice up the offseason, especially if it is several months long. On my first visit, many people did not take me seriously and it resulted in the most boring offseason that sucks has ever had.So I chose to come back again the next offseason and the one after and the place improved quite a bit. And here I am again standing before you. I have issued out 10 orders for everyone here. They are as follows:
Order 1: Stop making so many brain fart threads and bumping meaningless ones. The administers have enough of a problem locking threads that get needlessly bumped from eras ago that no one cares about, as well as the duplicate threads.
Order 2: Good lord, STOP all the ranking threads RIGHT NOW until deep in the offseason. After 18 seasons you would think that this gets old and that many members doing it would get subniced by the admins and rightfully so. If you make another ranking thread, you will be punished by result of having to make a Rank the King's orders thread.
Order 3: Proud Mambo your thing is good an all but I need you to post your mask thing in threads that are a piece of shit, like the RANKING ones instead of the ones that appear to be on their way to monster island.
Order 4: I order you guys to post a giant picture of my avator whenever I post in a thread. Its hard enough that I'm trying to spice up the offseason and I demand respect.
Order 5: Similar to order 4, is to the admins to make this thread a sticky, so newbies and other fucktards can stay reminded of what to do while we await the dreaded 3-4 month offseason and to the rest of you, never let my threads fall off of page 1
Order 6: Admins you will unban all of my relatives of me like Satan of Sucks and King of Sucks III. POSTNUMBER and RUDY, I don't give a damn that you two have been memory holed, I order you both to create nics related to me to be my wingman as we go into the dreaded offseason fighting. If you don't do it, then we may end up worse off than the offseason of my first appearance at sucks.
Order 7: Paris Hilton I order you to step up and join me. Stop posting with your username and start posting as Queen of Sucks.
Order 8: I know you admins will hate this order the most, but we need to drop the memory hole policy and let the gimmicks fly out. Not the ones that suck, but original ones and funny ones should be able to do, especially with nothing about to go on here. You never know if we might not get any show ups from the survivors or less than 10 replies a day on this forum.
Order 9: Which brings me to this. We should make a goal to get AT LEAST half of the survivors from the current season to come chat here. That means 8 survivors with their own 50+ page threads and with them consistently posting. Tips are to email them on their websites to come over here and chat, then when chatting, ask them to get other survivors to start posting here. You will be happy that you did this.
Order 10: MisterKFC, I enjoy your avator and enjoy kfc so much, but will stop buying your products if you do not come back to posting this instant! Life DOES taste better here at sucks with KFC, whether our members realize it or not!
Anyways, thats all my orders for this offseason. Onward, sucksters!

















