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Zonker wrote:

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LoreeG wrote:

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The problem I have with this "power" is that it was given to a weak person who's proven he is incapable of EARNING power by winning a challenge. The only people eligible for the coup d'etat should have been people who were prior winners of HOH. This way it doesn't look like its a rigging move to give a weaker player power. That is exactly what it looks like in this case.

Everyone had an equal chance at getting the power. So, there was no rigging.

I wouldn't expect anything else from a poster with gay porn for an avatar, but does anyone really believe this crap? The episode in which the cootie twat and the call-in numbers were revealed featured a LONG segment of Jeff and Jordan snuggling and making cutesy-poo faces at each other, along with extensive gushing from both their families about how cute and snuggly they are together. (It immediately preceded the reveal of the cootie twat in case you mouth-breathers forgot.) Pretty much everybody else got an edit-from-hell that episode. Are you people really this delusional? Yes, if you want to look at that way. Technically, everyone had an "equal" chance at winning. Just not everyone got an equal appeal to easily-brainwashed, McDonald's-feasting simpletons.

Attention everyone who plans to apply for "Big Brother 12." If you should get into the house, here is what you need to do to win.


1. Do jack shit the first 3 weeks of the game. If you actually do something the first 3 weeks of the game, fatass moo fraus will get upset that you are winning and whine that they are going to stop watching the show.
2. Don't be friends with anyone who does anyone the first 3 weeks of the game. If you are friends with people who do something, it will be death by association and the fatass moo fraus will get upset that you are winning and whine that they are going to stop watching the show.
3. While not doing jack shit, sit in the backyard, whine that you are not doing jack shit, and smoke a lot. This appeals to fatass moo fraus who hold such things as their major accomplishments in life.
4. Make sure to be an outcast. In fact, go out of your way to be an outcast by ignoring people so you can cook tuna and act like you're too good to talk to anyone else (all the while wondering why no one else is talking to you). If you are popular, you will be hated by fatass moo fraus who are forever reminded of high school when the popular people hated them. For obvious reasons.
5. Find a showmance, and then talk about highly intellectual stuff with said showmance like pooting and kicking people in the face. Fatass moo fraus pine for the touch and affection of a man, and are more than happy to live vicariously through those who can actually get such things, since they themselves cannot.
6. Remember Big Brother is not a game. It's a popularity contest. So don't strategize. Don't try to play. Don't win anything. Simply lie in bed all day with your shirt off, cuddle a cute blonde girl, and say how you're a wonderful person and you devote your life to finding a cure for cancer, serving soup to the homeless and rescuing stray kittens. This way, fatass moo fraus will know how terrific and wonderful and dreamy you are and will happily throw votes and panties your way.
7. Wait until the opposing side wins HOH again. Then bide your time until the fatass moo fraus decide that, because you were noble enough to suck so bad and be so useless at the game, you deserve to be thrown a bone.
8. You will always be thrown a bone for completing the first 7 steps, because fatass moo fraus' whining and threats to stop watching the show will always get the attention of Allison Grodner -- whose greatest fear is that fatass moo fraus will stop watching the show and it will get cancelled. Fatass moo fraus make up 99% of the demographic who watch Big Brother, so of course the show cannot afford to lose them.
9. Be attractive.
10. Don't be unattractive.


With these 10 simple steps, you too can win Big Brother.

salustra wrote:

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Hey, Riff, how do you explain the popularity of ED with your little recipe for how to win BB? No showmance, not attractive, verbally abusive, and playing the game like crazy from the minute he walked in, and America voted him advantages whenever they had a chance.

For the same reason you love Jeff and hate Ollie. Because you're hypocrites. And because the bulk of ED's vileness was left on the cutting room floor in favor of endless "Aw, isn't he Daddy of the Year?" package segments (complete with sappy music). Because you're easily-brainwashed sheep.

ED wasn't unattractive. If you like that sort of thing. What, you don't think moo fraus get hot flashes over the "rocker" types? The fact that a bunch of them here got hot flashes over the disgustingness that was Crazy James says it all.