Any night that involved broken glass and driving over brick walls HAD to be fun.
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7 things to do before a date
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 glazerboy |
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Posts: 3552 (11/21/09 10:12 AM) Registered User |
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TequilaVaquero |
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Posts: 4912 (11/21/09 11:40 AM) Registered User |
I think the biggest key is shaving your taint.
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El Bingo Gringo |
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Posts: 4015 (11/21/09 11:46 AM) Registered User |
^
is that a pun? |
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pie123452001 |
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Posts: 35763 (11/21/09 11:49 AM) Registered user |
I don't see it. The pun, I mean.
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ScruffyGuy |
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Posts: 11411 (11/21/09 12:50 PM) Registered User |
1) Take viagra. Not bad, but the order is off a little and a few items are missing. 1) Wash EVERYTHING. Be absolutely perfectly groomed in every way. 2) Early afternoon build-up. Smooching, hugging, touching, eye contact, grab his crotch when he grabs mine, or get to him first, whichever. 3) Take him out to dinner unless we have to go to his Mom's. 4) Get him some cookies from the cookie place. 5) Brush teeth twice after dinner. Mouthwash. 6) Viagra. 7) Hang around for an hour. Do whatever. Tonight, maybe some porn. We haven't done that in a long time. Might be spicy. 8) Repeat all the smooching stuff, but make it even more passionate. 9) Quickly change out his shower-head because it is JUST that easy to do. 10) You don't want to know the rest even more than you didn't want to know the above. There are, however, EXACTLY 46 steps. How did he know? |
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BillGuido |
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Posts: 3072 (11/21/09 12:55 PM) |
For scruffy, here is my list:
1. open door 
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ScruffyGuy |
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Posts: 11413 (11/21/09 1:01 PM) Registered User |
That used to be my dating strategy! It served me well for many years. Once I got to know them I'd just leave the door open, eliminating that cumbersome first step entirely. |
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BillGuido |
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Posts: 3078 (11/21/09 1:05 PM) |
Ha ha!
I think Scruffy is the person in life that you "miss" but who could have been the one. The passing of ships in the night. It's ok, it's all about geography and timing and I cannot ever EVER wish the young bear ill-will. Just my luck in life. |
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ScruffyGuy |
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Posts: 11415 (11/21/09 1:10 PM) Registered User |
You'll find your guy.
Meanwhile, just tell the rest they can MapQuest directions to your place. Some have GPS in their cars and will get there on time, too. These are keepers. |
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BillGuido |
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Posts: 3080 (11/21/09 1:13 PM) |
Thanks Scruff!
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 Mister Yuck |
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Posts: 6096 (11/21/09 1:43 PM) Registered User |
ScruffyGuy wrote: So you guys are so ugly you have to look at porn to do each other? |
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Ghostie LaRue |
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Posts: 145 (11/21/09 2:13 PM) |
of all the things he said, THAT is the one you decide to attack him on? Wow. I would have gone for the 'grooming' comment. Scruff is a bear. To him,
'grooming' is removing the chicken wing crumbs out of his beard, and using a wet nap from the diner he went to to clean his fingers.
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BillGuido |
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Posts: 3101 (11/21/09 2:15 PM) |
Mister Yuck wrote: Oh my gosh, I am model material - both in looks and body. But you keep on with whatever validates your existence/world view. Hmm, well, I have lots of years of experience, and I don't think you would EVER want me to tell you who you really are! |
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TequilaVaquero |
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Posts: 4927 (11/21/09 2:18 PM) Registered User |
pie123452001 wrote:I'm with Pie, did I make a pun I don't see? Is shaving my taint a pun? |
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BillGuido |
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Posts: 3102 (11/21/09 2:24 PM) |
I actually think Mister Yuck would die of asphyxiation if I were to close my thighs over his head.
No, I'm serious. |
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TequilaVaquero |
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Posts: 4931 (11/21/09 3:16 PM) Registered User |
Are you implying that Mr. Yuck is currently sucking your cock? I'm just trying to clarify here.
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Mister Yuck |
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Posts: 6097 (11/21/09 3:19 PM) Registered User |
BillGuido wrote: well I wasn't talking to you but if the shoe fits |
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BillGuido |
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Posts: 3113 (11/21/09 3:25 PM) |
TequilaVaquero wrote: Mister Yuck is submissive by nature. Even he knows that. I think he would LOVE sucking a cock while being "strangulated" by strong masculine thighs. That's what he lives for. Especially if he is sucking a cock of a 20 - 30 year old (hence his adoration of BBSpencer). He is old for sure, at least 43. His twilight years are gone. but he sure will try to bat eyelashes at the young gays. To no avail. I am in my early 30s, so even though I work out a ton and have a really muscular body, Mister Yuck would shun me. The reality is.......thank God! Queens like Mister Yuck are extremely lonely because as SMART AS THEY ARE (bookwise), they lack commonsense. Hee hee. |
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Mister Yuck |
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Posts: 6098 (11/21/09 3:52 PM) Registered User |
Has that wretched movie redefined twilight to mean youth? And submissive types would not exactly be attracted to BBSpencer. I like him b/c he's
authentically funny, that is to say he doesn't make up a cliched persona on the boards.
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BillGuido |
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Posts: 3116 (11/21/09 4:00 PM) |
Mister Yuck wrote: Oh honey. Oh honey. You don't really want me to expose why you like BB, do you? Good God would it be painful. You like NC too. That TOTALLY fits into the, er, well, let's call it diagnosis....... Nah, don't open up the box. I'll be silent. |
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- Survivor Sucks
- Lions, Tigers, Survivors - Oh My!
- Survivor Spoilers
- MESS Hall Tribal Council
- MESS Hall Archive
- Survivor Speculation
- Survivor 21+
- The Amazing Race
- Big Brother
- Big Brother - PAST SEASONS
- The Apprentice
- American Idol
- American Idol PAST SEASONS
- The Mole
- Lost
- Other Shows That Suck
- Off Topic
- Clubs That Suck. No, Really.
- The Dump
- Monster Island
- Purgatory
- FAQ
- In Memory, 9/11/01
