An OT Christmas Tale
Christmas Eve, at the edge of a rooftop high
Stood a fucking loser yelling at the night sky.
He lost his job, his wife was a filthy web whore
As an OT poster everyone thought him a bore.
Done screaming at God, the fucktard shuts his eyes
And drops a typed note with his stupid "goodbyes."
He walks up to the edge, all ready to jump off
But stops when behind him he hears a loud cough.
It's Santa Claus who asks him "are you ok?"
The loser tells Santa about his fucked up day.
Then again he walks to the edge for a jump
As Santa shouts out "not tonight, you chump!"
"It's Christmas so I'll give three gifts to you
And I will have a small task for you to do"
Santa Claus says, "let me help you please"
The asshole in deep despair, finally agrees.
"That would be wonderful thanks," he said
So Santa Claus told him what was ahead
"Firstly, go home to your wife who is there
Waiting dressed in her sexiest underwear."
"Longing for you and begging forgiveness
She wants only you and your fond caress.
And as for the recent loss of her affection
She will have absolutely no recollection."
"Secondly, go into work after the holiday
Sit at your desk and work the same way.
Your salary will have been well increased
No one will know your employment ceased."
"Thirdly, when you visit OT to post a new thread
They'll all find you witty and not want you dead.
You'll be charming and loved, just wait and see
After all I'm Santa, so you must believe in me."
And the dude who was down a moment before
Stepped back from the edge, his spirit did soar
The moron, thrilled, said "oh thank you, thank you!"
Then said, "what is this task you want me to do?"
"Drop your pants and then quickly bend down"
The man did as Santa asked, wearing a frown
Then Santa Claus gave him a brutal ass raping
Leaving the poor man bleeding, his hole gaping
Afterwards Santa asked, "son, how old are you?"
Wiping his tears he replied "actually I'm forty two."
"You're too old to believe in me, you stupid shit!"
Said the fat gay bastard in the Santa Claus outfit.
Christmas Eve, at the edge of a rooftop high
Stood a fucking loser yelling at the night sky.
He lost his job, his wife was a filthy web whore
As an OT poster everyone thought him a bore.
Done screaming at God, the fucktard shuts his eyes
And drops a typed note with his stupid "goodbyes."
He walks up to the edge, all ready to jump off
But stops when behind him he hears a loud cough.
It's Santa Claus who asks him "are you ok?"
The loser tells Santa about his fucked up day.
Then again he walks to the edge for a jump
As Santa shouts out "not tonight, you chump!"
"It's Christmas so I'll give three gifts to you
And I will have a small task for you to do"
Santa Claus says, "let me help you please"
The asshole in deep despair, finally agrees.
"That would be wonderful thanks," he said
So Santa Claus told him what was ahead
"Firstly, go home to your wife who is there
Waiting dressed in her sexiest underwear."
"Longing for you and begging forgiveness
She wants only you and your fond caress.
And as for the recent loss of her affection
She will have absolutely no recollection."
"Secondly, go into work after the holiday
Sit at your desk and work the same way.
Your salary will have been well increased
No one will know your employment ceased."
"Thirdly, when you visit OT to post a new thread
They'll all find you witty and not want you dead.
You'll be charming and loved, just wait and see
After all I'm Santa, so you must believe in me."
And the dude who was down a moment before
Stepped back from the edge, his spirit did soar
The moron, thrilled, said "oh thank you, thank you!"
Then said, "what is this task you want me to do?"
"Drop your pants and then quickly bend down"
The man did as Santa asked, wearing a frown
Then Santa Claus gave him a brutal ass raping
Leaving the poor man bleeding, his hole gaping
Afterwards Santa asked, "son, how old are you?"
Wiping his tears he replied "actually I'm forty two."
"You're too old to believe in me, you stupid shit!"
Said the fat gay bastard in the Santa Claus outfit.
