Thoughts:

01) Did Miss Missouri USA say, in her top-10 finalist piece, "I think that's why I want that dick."? I had to rewind it to that part after the pageant finished, and I thought that's what she said. And if she actually said it, whose dick did she want? The Donald's? Eeuw.

02) It's been seven years since someone won the swimsuit and evening gown categories at Miss USA, but didn't even finish in the top three. Lindsey Jo Harrington was way overrated, and I'm glad that she was brought down a few pegs.

03) This was the first time that I heard "Paralyze" by Finger 11, and I never want to hear that shit again.

04) Donny and Marie Osmond were funny and charming, as they usually are.

05) My God, the final questions were bland.

06) As for Crystle Stewart's chances at Miss Universe: she certainly has a shot, but we'll have to wait awhile to see who exactly she'll be competing against.