Ron White is off-the-fucking-chain funny.
"I had the right to remain silent... but I didn't have the ability."
"Stop spending money on research for products like Cialis and Viagra, and instead, invest that money in research to develop a product that makes semen taste like chocolate."
"...my grandma caught me in the bathroom just a'doin it. She said, 'It says in the Bible, young man, that it is better for your seed to fall in the belly of a whore than on the ground.' I said, 'Tough to argue with that logic, Grandma. You got 50 bucks?'"
"I had the right to remain silent... but I didn't have the ability."
"Stop spending money on research for products like Cialis and Viagra, and instead, invest that money in research to develop a product that makes semen taste like chocolate."
"...my grandma caught me in the bathroom just a'doin it. She said, 'It says in the Bible, young man, that it is better for your seed to fall in the belly of a whore than on the ground.' I said, 'Tough to argue with that logic, Grandma. You got 50 bucks?'"
