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Posts: 619
(02/10/09 11:40 AM)
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Bart: If you really wanted us to be neater, you'd serve us out of one long bowl. Marge: You're talking about a trough. We're not going to eat from a trough. And another thing, it's only 5:15. Why are you in your underwear? Bart: Hey, this ain't the Ritz
Marge: Well, maybe we could use it once, and then return it. Homer: Marge, we're not talking about a toothbrush here.
Kirk: Ah, come on Luanne, you know what this is. Luanne: Kirk, I don't know what it is. Kirk: [sighs] It could not be more simple, Luanne. You want me to show this to the cat, and have the cat tell you what it is? 'Cause the cat's going to get it. Luanne: I'm sorry, I'm not as smart as you, Kirk. We didn't all go to Gudger College. [timer dings] Kirk: It's dignity! Gah! Don't you even know dignity when you see it?
Kirk: Why don't you tell them one of your little bedtime stories, huh? Like the one about how rotten it is to be married to a loser. Or how about the one about how I carry a change purse? Yeah, a purse!
Luanne: I want a divorce! [everyone gasps] Kirk: [surprised] I... I... a divorce? [resolute] Sure. Divorce. Hey, you got it toots! And here's a picture even you can figure out! [draws a circle in a rectangle] It's a door! Use it! Kirk: Singles life is great, Homer. I can do whatever I want. Today I drank a beer in the bathroom. Homer: The one down the hall. Kirk: Yeah! And another great thing, you get your own bed. I sleep in a racing car, do you? Homer: I sleep in a big bed with my wife. Kirk: Oh. Yeah.
Kirk: You're letting me go?! Boss: Kirk, crackers are a family food. Happy families. Maybe single people eat crackers, we don't know. Frankly, we don't want to know. It's a market we can do without. Kirk: So that's it, after twenty years: "So long, good luck"? Boss: I don't recall saying "good luck."
Milhouse: [makes racing noises] And the winner of the Milhouse 500 is... Milhouse!
Homer: I know you're only eight years old, and I don't want to put a lot of pressure on you, but you've got to save my marriage! Lisa: Oh. Okay. Can I stay up? Homer: [thinks] All right.
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