RADICAL!
Jon-a-than Pen-ner
Jon-a-than Pen-ner is kewl
Jon-a-than Pen-ner
Jon-a-than Pen-ner
Jon-a-than Pen-ner is kewl
Jon-a-than Pen-ner
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The Church of Jonathan Christ - The Leg and The Resurrection
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 Us Kids Know |
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Posts: 4161 (03/27/08 6:36 PM) Registered user
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Undertakeress |
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Posts: 5140 (03/27/08 6:56 PM) Registered User |
Praise be, Apostle Schlong
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lemurwrench |
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Posts: 40 (03/27/08 7:30 PM) |
My love for Jonathan goes beyond all words,
and is returned from up above the soaring birds It inspires me to never sin and to purify myself within with every deed done in his name i feel my soul released from blame but this happiness il not have alone to others must his light be shown couplets FTW! |
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PagongSchlong |
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Posts: 2372 (03/27/08 7:37 PM) Registered User |
Nice, Lemur.
I'm a fan of the Holy Haiku's and quite honestly, I'd like to see some more of 'em. |
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melicatsmom |
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Posts: 308 (03/27/08 7:46 PM) Registered User |
Wow, just had an experience.
I was surprised to find the Hate Thread so far up on the board so I wanted to see what was being said, so I clicked on it. And I simply don't get it. I used to be one of them, at least up until episode 13 of Cook Islands and the family reward when I saw him with Stacy and denied the chance to be with her by being sent back to Exile Island. My hate warmed to dislike for him and he was voted off that night. But now I'm looking at what's being said and I honestly can't see how it was that I used to be one of them. It's kinda like reading a thread written by aliens. Tell me, my friends. I know many of you have loved JPC from the beginning, but how could the blindness have taken me so easily only to now see the light so clearly? |
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PagongSchlong |
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Posts: 2373 (03/27/08 7:55 PM) Registered User |
The "hate" thread has no legs to stand on. It is merely full of people who really LOVE JCP but are having a difficult time channeling their emotions
appropriately.
And it was on page 3. A Cirie lover just bumped it because I added hate to the Cirie thread. Take the JCP "hate" thread with a grain of salt. |
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melicatsmom |
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Posts: 309 (03/27/08 8:01 PM) Registered User |
It's not that I'm hurt by them, Apostle Schlong. I'm simply mystified by them. And I'm mystified by my knowledge that I used to understand them
and now they seem as different to me as I am to an amoeba.
I am so thankful that I am not that way anymore. |
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Us Kids Know |
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Posts: 4170 (03/27/08 8:05 PM) Registered user
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One time I was with Penner in the back of a pickup truck, along with a live deer. Penner goes up to the deer and says, 'I'm Jonathan Penner! SAY IT!' Then he manipulates the deer's lips in such a way as to make it say, 'jonanthnpnr' ... It wasn't exactly like it, but it was pretty good for a deer! |
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OnlyMatthew |
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Posts: 997 (03/27/08 8:06 PM) Registered user |
UKK was that a pro JP post or an anti JP post
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PagongSchlong |
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Posts: 2374 (03/27/08 8:10 PM) Registered User |
Considering JP clearly pwned the deer, I'd say it was PRO.
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Us Kids Know |
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Posts: 4172 (03/27/08 8:14 PM) Registered user
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Did I ever tell you about the time Penner and I went horseback riding, but there weren't any horses around? Anyway, Penner throws a saddle on my back and
rides me around Wyoming for three days. Well, wouldn't ya know it, my stamina increased with each day, and I developed tremendous leg muscles. So anyway,
Penner decides to enter me into the Breeders Cup under the name Turkish Delight. And I'm running in second place, and I'm running, and I break my
ankle. So anyway, they're about to shoot me. Then someone from the crowd yells out, "God bless him, Dont shoot him, hes a human!"
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PagongSchlong |
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Posts: 2375 (03/27/08 8:19 PM) Registered User |
Are you confusing JP with Bill Brasky?
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GodIsAnAtheist |
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Posts: 3166 (03/27/08 8:20 PM) Registered user |
I've been fond of our Savior from the pre-show interviews before Cook Islands aired. I knew even then that this "Jonathan Penner" fellow was a
prophet who spoke such true Words. It was not until the show began that his Word touched my soul and delivered such powerful meaning that I was compelled to
Know and Love Him and devote my life to learning his Teachings.
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OnlyMatthew |
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Posts: 999 (03/27/08 8:22 PM) Registered user |
I am giving Jonathan Penner my 999th post, a post full of love and ultimacy.
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PagongSchlong |
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Posts: 2376 (03/27/08 8:24 PM) Registered User |
That was beautiful, Apostle GIAA.
Brother Matthew, where is that priceless 1,000th post going? Dedication much? |
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Us Kids Know |
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Posts: 4173 (03/27/08 8:24 PM) Registered user
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PagongSchlong wrote: Of course not. Penner's family crest is a picture of a barracuda eating Bill Brasky. |
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PagongSchlong |
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Posts: 2377 (03/27/08 8:25 PM) Registered User |
I heard that Jonathan Penner wears a live rattlesnake as a condom.
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Us Kids Know |
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Posts: 4174 (03/27/08 8:30 PM) Registered user
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Did I ever tell you about the time Penner was in a production of The King & I? Well anyway, before the show, Penner chloroforms the entire cast,
and slowly eats them in front of the audience for two hours. The production got pretty good reviews.
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OnlyMatthew |
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Posts: 1000 (03/27/08 8:36 PM) Registered user |
BROTHERS AND SISTERS, you are living in the day where dreams are made. The day of:
ONLYMATTHEW's 1000 POST CTS, YOU GET NOTHING, YOU LOSE, GOOD DAY SIR. |
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PagongSchlong |
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Posts: 2378 (03/27/08 8:37 PM) Registered User |
Did I ever tell you about the time Jonathan Penner took his family to Sea World? Anyway, they were watching Shamu the whale when Penner got splashed. So
Penner yells, "I'm Jonathan Penner and nobody gets me wet!" So he climbs into the tank, grabs Shamu and throws the whale into the audience,
splashes him and yells, "Now how do you like it?!?!?"
Then damn if Penner didn't get in there and finish the show. |
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- Survivor Sucks
- Lions, Tigers, Survivors - Oh My!
- Survivor Spoilers
- MESS Hall Tribal Council
- MESS Hall Archive
- Survivor Speculation
- Survivor 20+
- The Amazing Race
- Big Brother
- Big Brother - PAST SEASONS
- The Apprentice
- American Idol
- American Idol PAST SEASONS
- The Mole
- Lost
- Other Shows That Suck
- Off Topic
- Clubs That Suck. No, Really.
- The Dump
- Monster Island
- Purgatory
- FAQ
- In Memory, 9/11/01
