Given how bored I've been lately, I decided to rank the Survivors and make a topic about it. Then I got to thinking, and I ranked the 60 tribes as well.
Soon enough, I'd ranked the Survivors, the tribes, the seasons, the MERGED tribes, the winners, and I've even been thinking of ranking the episodes
when I get the chance. Anyway, I don't really feel that there need to be a big intro. I will keep track of my lists so you guys don't have to search
through all the pages of this thread though, 'cause you know I love you guys. :D
Survivor Castaways: Post # 1 - Post # 553 (Pages 1-28)
Survivor Winners: Post # 586 - Post # 653 (Pages 30-33)
Survivor Tribes: Post # 671 - Post # 1006 (Pages 34-51)
Survivor Merged Tribes: Post # 1036 - Post # 1137 (Pages 52-57)
Survivor Seasons: Post # 1164 - Post # 1299 (Pages 59-65)
Here's my first list, the Survivor Castaways.
237. Osten Taylor (Survivor: Pearl Islands - 11th Place)
I don't think a person can make a list of Survivors and not put Osten either at the bottom, or at least in the bottom ten. He came into the game on the first day, barely knowing how to swim (prepetuating a negative stereotype in the process) and he stupidly sold all of his clothes except for his boxer shorts to get his tribe money with which to buy supplies. This would be okay if the tribe hadn't left the village with MORE than enough money to buy MORE supplies. And to top it off, without his clothes, Osten complained about how cold he was at night. In addition to the clothing fiasco, he also made the rude gesture of telling the women of the tribe to flash their breasts in order to get supplies.
Now at that point, Osten's just an ass, but the thing that gets him the very last spot on this list is what happens in episode 2. He complains about how cold and uncomfortable life is, and then he loses the tarp from their shelter, and he just throws in the towel. The most muscular guy in the game practically begs his tribe to vote him off because he MIGHT catch pneumonia. There are two outcasts to the clique alliance that he's a part of, and they would do anything to stay in the game, and all the while, Osten wants to quit.
Osten lasts until the seventh episode, when he learns that the six players voted out of the tribe get a chance to come back. They win the challenge and Morgan has to go to tribal council. Rather than manning up and working around it, Osten really DOES quit, because of all his pathetic reasoning earlier, and because he doesn't find the outcast twist fair. Osten is the most pathetic person ever to play the game. He was terrified of nature, he was an idiot, and he quit the game when so many people would KILL to get his spot. No one else deserves the bottom of this list more than him.
236. Lisi Linares (Survivor: Fiji - 11th Place)
While Osten is the most pathetic guy ever to play the game, I'm sure Lisi could give him a run for his money. For starters, she was absolutely abysmal at challenges. I mean, Michelle may have fallen from the platform while calling for her tribe, and Gary may have fallen during the slip and slide challenge, but it takes a special kind of uncoordinated idiot to trip and fall on flat ground.
Lisi's game started off on the Moto tribe, also known as the "Haves" tribe. Basically, it meant that she got to sit around in the lap of luxury with a bed, a couch, and all the rewards she could possibly want, and basically have no fear of losing challenges, due to how badly dehydrated and weak the other tribe was. Moto was undefeated in ANY challenge until a single reward a couple episodes before the merge. As such, Lisi was able to form a nice groove in that couch for her fat ass.
She somehow managed to get in good with four people much younger than her who, in most instances, would never EVER give her the time of day. She also led the crusade to take out Liliana, the strongest woman on the tribe, all because Liliana made her feel uncomfortable about her position in the tribe.
Lisi was a vile and despicable human being before that, but it just got worse at the tribe swap. Much like Osten, she came to a twist that didn't work out for her, and she suddenly became a whiny, little baby who wanted to go home. She got sent to Exile Island twice and she bitched and moaned about how bad she had it, and how much her tribe sucked (as though she was contributing at ALL in the challenges). And the worst part is that her bad attitude was basically an act the whole time. She was just hamming it up for the cameras and being a bitch to get screen-time. Ugh, Lisi is the most sickening person ever cast.
235. James "Rocky" Reid (Survivor: Fiji - 12th Place)
Speaking of people who were completely fake on TV, the third worst person ever to play Survivor is Rocky. Day 1, Rocky decided it would be a good idea to start a fight with Dreamz. He went right into his "Rocky" persona and basically acted like a complete asshole for little to no reason whatsoever. This got him a LOT of camera time, so much so that he beat Stephenie and Rupert as the most visible player of all time, during his stay on the show.
Rocky was loud. He was obnoxious. He was even a little sexist, as it was mainly him who backed the "let's vote out the strong girl who dared to stand up and try to help us win the challenge" plan in episode 2, and then went on to vote out every woman on his tribe, except for Michelle. He even got pissed off at Rita for...wait for it...wait for it...talking too much!
Even worse than this was his constant harassment and poor treatment of Anthony. Anthony wasn't exactly the manliest of players while in the game, but he didn't exactly deserve to be put down and yelled at on a near-daily basis. When the tribes swapped, Anthony was unfortunately stuck with Rocky, who went on a crusade to get him voted out. The WORST moment of the season was Anthony's tribal council. Rocky basically yelled at him to stand up for himself, and when he tried to, Rocky just talked over him and completely shot him down. Rocky was a jerk for the sole purpose of wanting airtime, and he got it at the expense of poor Anthony.
The absolute worst thing about Rocky's mindset in the game was the fact that he constantly targetted the people who were weak in challenges (or even people who hadn't done anything wrong, like Erica or Rita) when HE cost his tribe more challenges than a lot of them. Who can possibly forget the memory challenge where Ravu needed only ONE match to win their first immunity, and EVERYONE knew where it was. Rocky was sent out, and he completely blew the challenge for his tribe. I hated him every episode in which he survived, and the episode where it came down to him versus Lisi, it was great, because the end result was bound to be good, regardless.
234. JoAnna Ward (Survivor: Amazon - 13th Place)
It's hard to believe that JoAnna WASN'T acting during her season, but sadly, she wasn't. a lot of this write-up is going to sound like her Hall of Shame entry, but that's only because they summarize JoAnna so well. I mean, there's only four episodes in which we were blighted with JoAnna, but still, there's a lot of shame to the way she played the game, and it's just easiest to summarize the best write-up for her horrible personality.
First off, JoAnna was a born-again Christian. Now, they can be nice (as evidenced by Leslie) and polite. JoAnna however, wasn't. She was the kind of hardcore Christian that criticizes others for their beliefs as long as they don't correspond with her own. In the first episode (and later ones) she refused to touch the immunity idol for the sole reason that "Thou shalt not worship any other Gods but Me." Because I'm sure the women of Jaburu sat around camp, drinking blood and slaughtering pigs beneath the immunity idol whenever they won it.
JoAnna also got into a fight with Christy over a stupid misunderstanding. Christy, being deaf, could not know what had gone on during the night, as she can't read lips at night. So when Jeanne told her and mentioned JoAnna's crazy, anti-idol ranting, Christy, as many people would, called it stupid. JoAnna overheard and immediately blew the whole situation out of proportion. She yelled at Christy, she blocked her own mouth so Christy couldn't read her lips, and she went on a crusade to take Christy out for such a simple and innocent comment. The irony is that JoAnna is a high school guidance counselor, and she should've known better than to respond to Christy in such an immature manner. She gives Christians everywhere a bad name.
233. Mookie Lee (Survivor: Fiji - 8th Place)
Mookie was Rocky's right hand man in Fiji. They were together on pretty much every vote, and they ran the show at Ravu until the swap, at which point Mookie became a member of the four Horsemen, with Edgardo, Alex, and Dreamz. Now, on the surface, this seems like a pretty inconsequential rap sheet for someone who got 8th place. But of course, Mookie wouldn't be this far down on the list if he hadn't completely fucked up hardcore, now would he?
Now first off, being Rocky's right hand man means that you're a complete moron, and you're also too pathetic to dominate an even bigger idiot. With Rocky, Mookie basically managed to vote off anyone that wasn't a complete musclehead. That includes every woman on the Ravu tribe and Anthony. With Rocky and Mookie at the helm, the Ravu tribe was let into a bigger whole than the whole "Haves vs. Have-Nots" twist had put them in.
And when they switched, Mookie continued to show his stupidity, making bad move after bad move He joined the four horsemen, who really had no reason whatsoever to show loyalty to him, as mentioned earlier, and then found the immunity idol, which he blew in the most spectacular blindsiding ever. To compound his stupidity, he then searched through Yau-Man's bag and confronted him about it, based solely on the misinformation that Stacy and Cassandra had heard them talking. Mookie's meatheaded idiocy lands him in the bottom five of my list.
232. Lex van den Berghe (Survivor: Africa - 3rd Place & Survivor: All-Stars - 9th Place)
Now, I know Lex was on All-Stars, and he was there for a reason, but c'mon, Amber and Jenna Lewis were on All-Stars too, and they sucked. Now Lex is extremely low for a good reason. He was extremely bitter and paranoid, and twice, he assumed the leadership role on his tribe. Both times, he led them down a path that would end most other tribes. The first time, he got lucky. The second time, he got Pagonged.
In Africa, Lex was the leader of the Boran tribe, and he made good decisions during the pre-merge portion of the game. He took out the weak players, and got rid of Lindsey at the switch. However, when the tribes merged, he immediately began making some of the dumbest moves of the game. He has a 6-4 numerical advantage at the merge, and he starts by voting out one of his own tribemates from the original Boran tribe. Worse still, he TOLD Clarence that he was voting for him. Lex's fake chivalry and honor wouldn't let him blindside someone. So at tribal council Clarence voted for Lex and Teresa tossed a vote at Lex because of a promise she made to Clarence. No big deal, right? WRONG!
Lex went on the warpath, accusing quite a few people of disloyalty before finally settling on Kelly, one of his closest allies. He even had the nerve to go to her before tribal council and tell her she was going home. Kelly turned things around. She got Samburu together, and Lex got four votes at tribal council. He could've easily gone home, had Brandon not betrayed his allies. So in Africa, Lex turned his 6-4 advantage into a 4-4 tie that only went in his favor because of worse moves made by Samburu.
Lex ended up losing in the final 3 to Kim Johnson and her amazing ability to stand in place for a very long time, but his legacy wasn't over yet. No no. Lex wanted to be the best Survivor player ever. So he went into All-Stars with a plan to prove that he WAS the best. So right off the bat, he eliminated Richard, the legend himself who was feeding his tribe. Not the best move, but things could've gone worse. He then voted off Colby, the strongest member of his tribe. Next was Ethan, one of his closest friends. It was the final ten at that point, and his tribe was the one with the four going up against six.
Fortunately for him, there was a tribe swap that conveniently kept his four together, and gave him a free vote out in Amber. However, while Lex had been so eager to vote off his friends, Rob Mariano turned the game around by making a deal with Lex to save his girl. So instead of the easy vote going, Jerri was voted off, making FOUR votes in a row that were completely bad moves. And the best part is that when Lex merged and Rob screwed him over, Lex was offended and thought that Rob had more class. So for being a hypocritical whiner that made more dumb moves than perhaps any other Survivor, Lex gets the 232 spot.
231. Ghandia Johnson (Survivor: Thailand - 13th Place)
Ghandia was loud. Ghandia was annoying. Ghandia was extremely outspoken and rude at times. She was supposedly a karate master, and she STILL sucked in challenges. She was probably the single most damaging member of the Chuay Ghan tribe. But that's not enough to keep her out of the top 230. No, Ghandia's in the bottom seven players in Survivor history because of Grindgate.
Grindgate, for those of you not familiar with Thailand, (or maybe not familiar with the terminology) was an incident in which Ghandia and Ted, two older, black players who'd become friends and allies, fell asleep and Ted supposedly grinded against Ghandia. Ghandia was pissed, as was her right, but Ted apologized and tried to smooth things over between the two of them. At first things worked out, but then Ghandia went on the warpath again. I've gotta quote the Reality TV Hall of Shame again, but Ghandia basically ranted and raved so much about how she had been "raped" that she completely defamed her own husband, Ted, his wife, and herself, not to mention the thousands (millions even) of women who are either sexually harassed or raped in our country alone.
Ghandia's childish behavior and her loud, obnoxious, "poor me" attitude to a situation that she seemed to have completely blown out of proportion is what nets her such a low ranking on this list.
Survivor Castaways: Post # 1 - Post # 553 (Pages 1-28)
Survivor Winners: Post # 586 - Post # 653 (Pages 30-33)
Survivor Tribes: Post # 671 - Post # 1006 (Pages 34-51)
Survivor Merged Tribes: Post # 1036 - Post # 1137 (Pages 52-57)
Survivor Seasons: Post # 1164 - Post # 1299 (Pages 59-65)
Here's my first list, the Survivor Castaways.
237. Osten Taylor (Survivor: Pearl Islands - 11th Place)
I don't think a person can make a list of Survivors and not put Osten either at the bottom, or at least in the bottom ten. He came into the game on the first day, barely knowing how to swim (prepetuating a negative stereotype in the process) and he stupidly sold all of his clothes except for his boxer shorts to get his tribe money with which to buy supplies. This would be okay if the tribe hadn't left the village with MORE than enough money to buy MORE supplies. And to top it off, without his clothes, Osten complained about how cold he was at night. In addition to the clothing fiasco, he also made the rude gesture of telling the women of the tribe to flash their breasts in order to get supplies.
Now at that point, Osten's just an ass, but the thing that gets him the very last spot on this list is what happens in episode 2. He complains about how cold and uncomfortable life is, and then he loses the tarp from their shelter, and he just throws in the towel. The most muscular guy in the game practically begs his tribe to vote him off because he MIGHT catch pneumonia. There are two outcasts to the clique alliance that he's a part of, and they would do anything to stay in the game, and all the while, Osten wants to quit.
Osten lasts until the seventh episode, when he learns that the six players voted out of the tribe get a chance to come back. They win the challenge and Morgan has to go to tribal council. Rather than manning up and working around it, Osten really DOES quit, because of all his pathetic reasoning earlier, and because he doesn't find the outcast twist fair. Osten is the most pathetic person ever to play the game. He was terrified of nature, he was an idiot, and he quit the game when so many people would KILL to get his spot. No one else deserves the bottom of this list more than him.
236. Lisi Linares (Survivor: Fiji - 11th Place)
While Osten is the most pathetic guy ever to play the game, I'm sure Lisi could give him a run for his money. For starters, she was absolutely abysmal at challenges. I mean, Michelle may have fallen from the platform while calling for her tribe, and Gary may have fallen during the slip and slide challenge, but it takes a special kind of uncoordinated idiot to trip and fall on flat ground.
Lisi's game started off on the Moto tribe, also known as the "Haves" tribe. Basically, it meant that she got to sit around in the lap of luxury with a bed, a couch, and all the rewards she could possibly want, and basically have no fear of losing challenges, due to how badly dehydrated and weak the other tribe was. Moto was undefeated in ANY challenge until a single reward a couple episodes before the merge. As such, Lisi was able to form a nice groove in that couch for her fat ass.
She somehow managed to get in good with four people much younger than her who, in most instances, would never EVER give her the time of day. She also led the crusade to take out Liliana, the strongest woman on the tribe, all because Liliana made her feel uncomfortable about her position in the tribe.
Lisi was a vile and despicable human being before that, but it just got worse at the tribe swap. Much like Osten, she came to a twist that didn't work out for her, and she suddenly became a whiny, little baby who wanted to go home. She got sent to Exile Island twice and she bitched and moaned about how bad she had it, and how much her tribe sucked (as though she was contributing at ALL in the challenges). And the worst part is that her bad attitude was basically an act the whole time. She was just hamming it up for the cameras and being a bitch to get screen-time. Ugh, Lisi is the most sickening person ever cast.
235. James "Rocky" Reid (Survivor: Fiji - 12th Place)
Speaking of people who were completely fake on TV, the third worst person ever to play Survivor is Rocky. Day 1, Rocky decided it would be a good idea to start a fight with Dreamz. He went right into his "Rocky" persona and basically acted like a complete asshole for little to no reason whatsoever. This got him a LOT of camera time, so much so that he beat Stephenie and Rupert as the most visible player of all time, during his stay on the show.
Rocky was loud. He was obnoxious. He was even a little sexist, as it was mainly him who backed the "let's vote out the strong girl who dared to stand up and try to help us win the challenge" plan in episode 2, and then went on to vote out every woman on his tribe, except for Michelle. He even got pissed off at Rita for...wait for it...wait for it...talking too much!
Even worse than this was his constant harassment and poor treatment of Anthony. Anthony wasn't exactly the manliest of players while in the game, but he didn't exactly deserve to be put down and yelled at on a near-daily basis. When the tribes swapped, Anthony was unfortunately stuck with Rocky, who went on a crusade to get him voted out. The WORST moment of the season was Anthony's tribal council. Rocky basically yelled at him to stand up for himself, and when he tried to, Rocky just talked over him and completely shot him down. Rocky was a jerk for the sole purpose of wanting airtime, and he got it at the expense of poor Anthony.
The absolute worst thing about Rocky's mindset in the game was the fact that he constantly targetted the people who were weak in challenges (or even people who hadn't done anything wrong, like Erica or Rita) when HE cost his tribe more challenges than a lot of them. Who can possibly forget the memory challenge where Ravu needed only ONE match to win their first immunity, and EVERYONE knew where it was. Rocky was sent out, and he completely blew the challenge for his tribe. I hated him every episode in which he survived, and the episode where it came down to him versus Lisi, it was great, because the end result was bound to be good, regardless.
234. JoAnna Ward (Survivor: Amazon - 13th Place)
It's hard to believe that JoAnna WASN'T acting during her season, but sadly, she wasn't. a lot of this write-up is going to sound like her Hall of Shame entry, but that's only because they summarize JoAnna so well. I mean, there's only four episodes in which we were blighted with JoAnna, but still, there's a lot of shame to the way she played the game, and it's just easiest to summarize the best write-up for her horrible personality.
First off, JoAnna was a born-again Christian. Now, they can be nice (as evidenced by Leslie) and polite. JoAnna however, wasn't. She was the kind of hardcore Christian that criticizes others for their beliefs as long as they don't correspond with her own. In the first episode (and later ones) she refused to touch the immunity idol for the sole reason that "Thou shalt not worship any other Gods but Me." Because I'm sure the women of Jaburu sat around camp, drinking blood and slaughtering pigs beneath the immunity idol whenever they won it.
JoAnna also got into a fight with Christy over a stupid misunderstanding. Christy, being deaf, could not know what had gone on during the night, as she can't read lips at night. So when Jeanne told her and mentioned JoAnna's crazy, anti-idol ranting, Christy, as many people would, called it stupid. JoAnna overheard and immediately blew the whole situation out of proportion. She yelled at Christy, she blocked her own mouth so Christy couldn't read her lips, and she went on a crusade to take Christy out for such a simple and innocent comment. The irony is that JoAnna is a high school guidance counselor, and she should've known better than to respond to Christy in such an immature manner. She gives Christians everywhere a bad name.
233. Mookie Lee (Survivor: Fiji - 8th Place)
Mookie was Rocky's right hand man in Fiji. They were together on pretty much every vote, and they ran the show at Ravu until the swap, at which point Mookie became a member of the four Horsemen, with Edgardo, Alex, and Dreamz. Now, on the surface, this seems like a pretty inconsequential rap sheet for someone who got 8th place. But of course, Mookie wouldn't be this far down on the list if he hadn't completely fucked up hardcore, now would he?
Now first off, being Rocky's right hand man means that you're a complete moron, and you're also too pathetic to dominate an even bigger idiot. With Rocky, Mookie basically managed to vote off anyone that wasn't a complete musclehead. That includes every woman on the Ravu tribe and Anthony. With Rocky and Mookie at the helm, the Ravu tribe was let into a bigger whole than the whole "Haves vs. Have-Nots" twist had put them in.
And when they switched, Mookie continued to show his stupidity, making bad move after bad move He joined the four horsemen, who really had no reason whatsoever to show loyalty to him, as mentioned earlier, and then found the immunity idol, which he blew in the most spectacular blindsiding ever. To compound his stupidity, he then searched through Yau-Man's bag and confronted him about it, based solely on the misinformation that Stacy and Cassandra had heard them talking. Mookie's meatheaded idiocy lands him in the bottom five of my list.
232. Lex van den Berghe (Survivor: Africa - 3rd Place & Survivor: All-Stars - 9th Place)
Now, I know Lex was on All-Stars, and he was there for a reason, but c'mon, Amber and Jenna Lewis were on All-Stars too, and they sucked. Now Lex is extremely low for a good reason. He was extremely bitter and paranoid, and twice, he assumed the leadership role on his tribe. Both times, he led them down a path that would end most other tribes. The first time, he got lucky. The second time, he got Pagonged.
In Africa, Lex was the leader of the Boran tribe, and he made good decisions during the pre-merge portion of the game. He took out the weak players, and got rid of Lindsey at the switch. However, when the tribes merged, he immediately began making some of the dumbest moves of the game. He has a 6-4 numerical advantage at the merge, and he starts by voting out one of his own tribemates from the original Boran tribe. Worse still, he TOLD Clarence that he was voting for him. Lex's fake chivalry and honor wouldn't let him blindside someone. So at tribal council Clarence voted for Lex and Teresa tossed a vote at Lex because of a promise she made to Clarence. No big deal, right? WRONG!
Lex went on the warpath, accusing quite a few people of disloyalty before finally settling on Kelly, one of his closest allies. He even had the nerve to go to her before tribal council and tell her she was going home. Kelly turned things around. She got Samburu together, and Lex got four votes at tribal council. He could've easily gone home, had Brandon not betrayed his allies. So in Africa, Lex turned his 6-4 advantage into a 4-4 tie that only went in his favor because of worse moves made by Samburu.
Lex ended up losing in the final 3 to Kim Johnson and her amazing ability to stand in place for a very long time, but his legacy wasn't over yet. No no. Lex wanted to be the best Survivor player ever. So he went into All-Stars with a plan to prove that he WAS the best. So right off the bat, he eliminated Richard, the legend himself who was feeding his tribe. Not the best move, but things could've gone worse. He then voted off Colby, the strongest member of his tribe. Next was Ethan, one of his closest friends. It was the final ten at that point, and his tribe was the one with the four going up against six.
Fortunately for him, there was a tribe swap that conveniently kept his four together, and gave him a free vote out in Amber. However, while Lex had been so eager to vote off his friends, Rob Mariano turned the game around by making a deal with Lex to save his girl. So instead of the easy vote going, Jerri was voted off, making FOUR votes in a row that were completely bad moves. And the best part is that when Lex merged and Rob screwed him over, Lex was offended and thought that Rob had more class. So for being a hypocritical whiner that made more dumb moves than perhaps any other Survivor, Lex gets the 232 spot.
231. Ghandia Johnson (Survivor: Thailand - 13th Place)
Ghandia was loud. Ghandia was annoying. Ghandia was extremely outspoken and rude at times. She was supposedly a karate master, and she STILL sucked in challenges. She was probably the single most damaging member of the Chuay Ghan tribe. But that's not enough to keep her out of the top 230. No, Ghandia's in the bottom seven players in Survivor history because of Grindgate.
Grindgate, for those of you not familiar with Thailand, (or maybe not familiar with the terminology) was an incident in which Ghandia and Ted, two older, black players who'd become friends and allies, fell asleep and Ted supposedly grinded against Ghandia. Ghandia was pissed, as was her right, but Ted apologized and tried to smooth things over between the two of them. At first things worked out, but then Ghandia went on the warpath again. I've gotta quote the Reality TV Hall of Shame again, but Ghandia basically ranted and raved so much about how she had been "raped" that she completely defamed her own husband, Ted, his wife, and herself, not to mention the thousands (millions even) of women who are either sexually harassed or raped in our country alone.
Ghandia's childish behavior and her loud, obnoxious, "poor me" attitude to a situation that she seemed to have completely blown out of proportion is what nets her such a low ranking on this list.
