CANNES, FRANCE - Kate Hudson has a new love in her life: a sole testicle.
The accomplished actress has recently been spotted with Lance Armstrong, who had a testicle removed a few years ago from cancer. Apparently just one is all Hudson needs.
"She's really happy," says a source close to Hudson. "Owen Wilson had two balls, and look how that turned up. Kate thinks that full-testicled men are too aggressive, since they have double the natural testosterone. But Kate has spent a lot of time with Lance's solo nad and she's really enjoying herself."
While Hudson was not available for comment, SCNN did reach Lance Armstrong. "After my ball-ectomy, I had a really hard time not being depressed. I tried dating Sheryl Crow, but she wasn't very open-minded. Kate has spent a lot of time with my one nut and made sure that it feels special without its bro."
Just another blonde that Lance will toss aside. Let's see, first his wife, then Sheryl Crow, then Tory Burch, then one of the Olsen twins, now Kate Hudson? WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH A NICE BRUNETTE???
