A few weeks ago, I was lucky enough to find myself a primo spot in Julie Chen's live audience for Big Brother. It was an experience that was both massively entertaining and wildly surreal. As soon as it was over, I wanted to go back, but I soon learned that contrary to what the show's staff says and encourages, repeat visits are a no-no with the ticketing company. Well, I wasn't about to let some arbitrary, bureaucratic decision by a third party hinder my Big Brother experience. That's right, my friends and I headed straight back to the CBS Radford studio lot and plopped ourselves back in the BB audience. It wasn't easy though, and the chain of events that led to our seating verged on saga status. But we made it, and we were lucky enough to see one of the most amazingly idiotic exit interviews ever.

The full story - including Jessie's Early Show interview, the story behind that "whoop" during Libra's vote, and how I won a free t-shirt - after the jump...

For this second outing to Big Brother, I again gathered up some of my more obsessed friends: Jash, Dan, and Intern Nick from TVgasm. IndianJones, unfortunately, was not able to attend this week as the demands of his job necessitated that he be elsewhere in this fine city. (I only mention this because IndianJones is a tag whore and likes to get his name tagged in as many posts as possible. Mission accomplished.)

Anyway, unlike last time, our logistics were a bit more precarious. First off, we weren't going to be arriving all together. Jash, Dan, and I would be driving in my fair chariot (word up, Camry) from Hollywood, but Intern Nick, descending from on high like a prodigal son, would be coming in from the dusty plains of Van Nuys. The plan was to meet up at the studio and all check in together. Already, I was a bit nervous. There were too many moving parts to this plan. Granted, there was only one moving part, but that was enough to cause concern. Raising the difficulty level of this entire rendez-vous was that we had to leave our cell phones in the car once we parked (they're prohibited on stage). This meant that once we arrived at CBS, there could be no further communication. WE WERE OFF THE GRID. The level of difficulty was shooting through the roof.

Well, we arrived at the studio at 3:15, and there were already a bunch of people there. We told the ticketing woman that we were waiting for one more, but she merely shot me a nervous look and said, "We're filling up really quickly." I asked how many spots were left, and she said not many. She really had no reason to lie, and judging by the numbers they were giving out to the people checking in before us, I could see we were running out of time. Last visit, our numbers were in the mid nineties. The people in front of us had spots in the low nineties. There are only about 108 seats in the studio; so I knew we had to act quickly.

But there was one obvious problem: WHERE WAS NICK??

According to Jash, Nick is very prompt, but alas, he was not living up to his reputation. A mild panic set in: abandon Nick? Or risk everything for unity?

Well, it's no surprise how I felt: EFF NICK! I'm seeing the mother effin' show!! Sorry, I'm very cutthroat when it comes to Chenbot experiences. Besides, how could I even consider not going to see the episode where Jessie would most likely be evicted?

Of course, I didn't quite articulate this, but I'm sure it registered fairly obviously on my face. Maybe that's why Jash, being the friendly soul (occasionally) that he is, volunteered to wait for Nick while Dan and I checked in. It was a risky move, and I'm not sure I would have done the same, but I guess that's why I'm sometimes considered a superficial bastard. Actually, the truth of the matter is that the audience people had conflicted stories on what we could and couldn't do. Some said we all had to check in now. Some said we could check in at different times and sit together. And some said, well, nothing. It was very confusing. The point is that Dan and I got into line, and Jash went off to search for Nick.

Well, by 3:45, there was no sign of Nick. "That's fucked up," I said repeatedly. After all, Jash had essentially given up his chance to be in the audience for Nick, who was beyond late. At this point, the standby line was so huge; there was not even a remote chance Jash could get in. By four o'clock, Jash resigned to the fact that he'd have to kill two hours in Studio City while we went in for the taping. To facilitate this experience, I gave him my car keys; so he could grab his wallet and cell phone out of my Camry. Oh well. Sucked for Jash.

By 4:15ish (don't know the exact time as my cell phone is my watch, and as such, it was stuck in my car), the audience coordinators started loading people into the studio. I should note, by the way, that where we lined up was a decent walk from the studio. This is an important fact for later.

Anyway, the CBS pages took the majority of the people in line off to the stage, leaving about twenty of us to stay behind. We were such a small group that soon murmurs surfaced that maybe, just maybe, we might not get in. The longer we stood out there, the more certain it became. And when the Big Brother staffer closed down the little tent that he had been under, it seemed like we were being left behind. Was this cruel cosmic justice for us deriding Nick? And could it be actually possible that after all this chaos, we too would be shunned from the Big Brother experience? Like a dueling cowboy with his hand hovering just over his gun, I was ready to pull a fast one on the audience coordinator. You see, I actually had a connection, but I wasn't going to use it unless I had trouble. This led to all sorts of further drama: would I pull the connection properly? Would she respond to it? Would I make things worse? It was all so stressful.

And then: a breakthrough. Just when all hope had seemed lost, the pages corralled us up and took us to the stage. THANK GOD. Things were looking good. As we marched slowly across the lot, we then encountered Jash standing around with Nick. Oh NICK. You late, late fool! The two of them smiled at us and said that Nick had actually been here at like 3:10 (oops, my bad), but instead of going to the audience loading area, he had walked directly to the stage. That's right: he was here, but not here. "The stage?" I asked in shock. "Why did you go to the stage?"

Alas, our march forced me to move on before hearing the answer. It seemed like a silly thing to do. I felt bad for doubting Nick's punctuality (sorry Nick), but I still was a bit puzzled about Nick's misplaced studio wanderlust. Nevertheless, our procession finally arrived at the Big Brother house, and as we stood there, waiting to go in, I turned around, and there at the end of the line were Jash and Nick! Had they just snuck onto the line? Nope. Turns out I found out later that one of the audience coordinators who was familiar with the situation told them to just get in the line. Somewhere along the way, they were then confused as VIP guests (they were looking quite dapper), and long story short, they were now officially part of the audience. It took some maneuvering, and there were some gaffes along the way, but in the end, all that matters was that we'd all be sitting in the studio, watching the Chenbot and smiling our asses off.

Anyway, as we loaded into the studio, Dan and I were placed stage left, and Nick and Jash were placed stage right. It was actually perfect because this way anytime anything funny happened, we could all glance at each other and make eyes much easier than if we had been seated four in a row. Nevertheless, poor Dan was miffed because my seat was closer to the central aisle, and based on our experience last time, that meant I'd probably get more screen time. Dan, sadly, was all but omitted from last week's show and was looking for greater on screen glory this time around. I kind of felt bad having the better seat. Oh well.

I should note that sitting two rows in front of us and a little to the right was an AWFUL woman. She was big and loud, and she seemed to think the entire show was based on her. She kept making loud comments and whatnot - almost like a deluded sense that she was the life of the party. Needless to say, she was the product of many glares from not just me and my friends, but everyone behind her. There was one girl who just turned around and looked up at us as if to say, "I mean, COME ON!" Look, I'm sure she's a very nice woman, but she was entirely too desperate for attention. But more on this loud woman a little later.

Not long after we took our seats, a producer came out to warm up the audience. Last time, we were treated to some rather dull movie trivia that did little to get people excited. This time around, however, the producers decided to wisely up the stakes by a) giving away Big Brother t-shirts, and b) employing Big Brother trivia - a much better fit. He also asked us several more questions about the house guests (Who would we want has HOH? Who would we want nominated?). It was a much more engaging experience from to to head, as Jessie might say.

Anyway, to get a free t-shirt, a member of the audience would have to be summoned to the stage and then have to answer three Big Brother trivia questions. The first guy who was called up was so excited you'd have thought he'd just been selected for The Price Is Right (which, by the way, was our code word for the last BB show we went to - lest anyone discover we were repeat visitors and get us ejected). Anyway, the first guy got his t-shirt without a problem. Then one of the producers said that there were some web people in the audience who most certainly had to answer some trivia. For a split second, I thought he might have been referring to me. And then I thought maybe Nick, as he still is with TVgasm. But alas, he was referring to two very excitable women who apparently run the site, bbfanatics.com.

WELL.

These ladies got up there, and even though the trivia was a little harder for them, it was still super easy and obvious. And yet they struggled on EVERY QUESTION. Sometimes they had a split decision, even with the audience helping them. I'm not out to disrespect any other Big Brother site as we're all a happy family, but c'mon, ladies. You were not representing the online community well, especially when there were two other bloggers from two larger television sites in your presence (I'm not normally this egotistical [yes I am] but incidents like these kind of bring it out).

Anyway, the women eventually got their t-shirts, and then the trivia continued. Someone else from the other side of the audience got up there, answered her questions, and got a t-shirt too. It was then that the producer announced there'd be one last person chosen. Dammit, I had to get picked - not only for the t-shirt, but to show the audience that we internet people are not total idiots (not that the ladies were idiots, but again, they were the only ones who had trouble with the trivia. Just sayin'). I knew, however, that the chances of me getting picked for trivia were slim to none. All the contestants minus one had come from my side of the audience. Surely, the producer would pick someone else from Jash's side.

But no! By some miraculous feat, the producer looked over at me and Dan, who were both stretching our hands upwards like two kindergarteners begging to go poddy. The guy pointed at us and said, "Okay, these guys want to do it. You guys choose amongst yourselves--" and I swear to God, before he even finished, I stood up and declared, "I'M DOING IT." I actually felt bad at my cold hearted ruthlessness, and had I been thinking clearly and not so consumed with representing the online community, I would have said that we could have both gone up, but adrenaline is adrenaline. What can I say? I was like fat girl hunting down cake, to paraphrase 50 Cent a bit.

Well, I got up there, and I have to admit, for the first few seconds, my heart was beating with excitement. I literally didn't even look at the audience, I was so pumped. I was just trying to focus on hearing the question. I'm starting to realize I'm really nowhere as cool under pressure as I'd like to be. But that's okay. It's my challenge, and I'll embrace it.

Anyway, the producer asked me which houseguest thought the earthquake last week was just a truck backing into the house. Before he was done, I blurted out, "JERRY!" I kind of screwed up his pacing, but nevertheless, I got it right. One down, two to go. But then suddenly, I heard a clamor behind me and a flurry of activity, punctuated with various people saying, "She's walking. She's walking." The producer suddenly handed me the t-shirt and said, "CONGRATULATIONS!!!" What? My glory was being aborted? But I hadn't even plugged my website yet!! A second later, suddenly yelled out, "Ladies and gentlemen, JULIE CHEN!" I turned around around there she was. She was not only closer than before, but I was standing in her area. I debated whether or not I should just loiter there and make a lame attempt to shake her hand (I was already in her vicinity), but her gait was too slow, thus making my lingering a bit too awkward. I sadly retreated off to the side, still relishing the bizarre notion that I was being ushered off a stage to make room for Julie Chen.

When I got back to my row, Dan had happily taken over my seat, which was fine. It was a small price to pay for selfishly bowling him over in my quest for a free t-shirt. With trivia over, the stage manager took over emceeing duties, informing us on all the things we should and shouldn't do. I asked if we could clap when we found out America's Choice for eviction, but I was later told that no, we couldn't. Nevertheless, while the guy tried to explain the rules, that AWFUL woman in front of us kept asking him dumb, jokey questions. It was as if she thought she were some amazing comedian, and while I can't really remember what she said, I can only convey that every time she opened her mouth, we all rolled our eyes. She was just plain terrible. AND LOUD. (Which was kind of funny because she was seated next to some deaf people. They lucked out that night). I just hope she's not reading this. If you are, well, take this all as constructive criticism.

Anyway, the show progressed much in the same way as last time; so I won't bore you with the technical details. I'll say that I did a much better time of not bursting out in loud laughter, but I can't say the same for Shelly, which is the name I've given the awful woman. After Libra placed her vote, Shelly let out a "Whooohooo!" which is the noise you all heard on your TV set. What a dumb idiot. She was the only one who made that noise, and I hope she felt dumb for doing it (probably didn't. She seemed to lack any and all self-awareness). During the commercial break, the stage manager actually had to reprimand her. He did it in a nice, jokey way, but we all could tell he was a bit annoyed.

Of course, when it comes to annoyed, no one topped Jessie, who marched out of that house with one of the more vivid scowls of recent memory. He was absolutely standoffish and charmless in his exit interview, and while you saw what he said on camera, what you missed was how he kept staring at himself in the monitors overhead and how he totally just ignored the audience behind him. Hey, he's not obligated to recognize us, but compared to Steven, who waved and cheered and seemed to relish the moment, Jessie was a total lemon. I pretty much laughed silently through his entire idiotic interview (c'mon, you can't do word association? Really?). And let's not overlook his strange (ie. WRONG) use of the term "face value," and the his proclamation that "arrogance" and his name should not be used in the same sentence. Dumb.

Later, during the HOH competition, it's a shame that you couldn't really hear the audience because we were murmuring like crazy. Everyone was really into it. In fact, everyone was really into all the segments. I still maintain my belief that the producers should keep the audio on the audience up during the taped packages.

Nevertheless, when Michelle won HOH, everyone clapped vigorously. I would have preferred Libra as HOH (imagine the craziness!), but I like Michelle, and I expect similar drama. Besides, Big Brother is really at its best when two sides of the house go back and forth on the power scale.

After the live show ended, Jessie returned to the stage for his Early Show interview, and he could not have been more of an awful subject. Chenbot had to squeeze the answers out of him, practically. He acted all "whatever" about everything, including the reveal that Dan was America's Player. He actually predicted that Dan was the twist, and when Julie confirmed it, Jessie merely shrugged and said, "I told you," - as if he were informing her, not the other way around. It was ridiculous (actually this response may have been in regards to the news that Michelle had just won HOH. I don't remember). He also had a strange explanation for his strategy, noting that just because he napped a lot this past week didn't mean that he had bad strategy. In fact, he had napped a lot every week, he said, which just proved that he was consistent. Yeah. I know. That's when Julie elaborated and said something to the effect of "Do you think you should have taken so many naps?"

Jessie also bemoaned the weight he had lost, informing us that now his back was super shredded. I'm not even joking. And in terms of Dan, Jessie complained that he always looked at himself in the mirror. All the time. This, of course, was coming from the guy who spent half of the Early Show interview not looking at Julie Chen but instead his face on the TV screens (he also asked as he sat down initially, "How's my hair?"). I really wish I could remember all the idiotic things he had said, but there was too much to take in. When the interview was done, he didn't even wave goodbye to the audience. He just stood up and walked off, leaving the Chenbot behind in a cloud of dust. She merely stood up, turned to us, and mouthed "Thank You" in a way that seemed to connote "Seriously, how awful was that?" I don't want to put any words in "Mrs. Chen's" mouth though. I'm just saying that's the way it seemed...

All in all, it was a fantastic experience yet again. Thanks to CBS for putting on a great show.

Oh, and as for Dan and his quest for televised fame... well, he certainly ended up on TV, but with almost all the close shots, the camera would zoom in and crop him out, somehow keeping me in frame. Shouldn't have switched those seats...

Here are some pics:

Now you can see the spatial arrangement.

The Awful Woman.

Randomly, if Renny and Ina Garten had a love child, it would be Dan's mom. SUE.

Nick fared quite well in the on-camera department.

Jash, however, got cut off a few times this week.

It was nothing compared to Dan. It was like HE WASN'T EVEN THERE!

Wait, there he is!

And, of course, the shirt!

Between CBS.com's slow posting schedule and my random trip to Vegas, I've been a bit behind with the Big Brother photocaps. That's not to say I'm any less entertained with the show. In fact, Big Brother 10 has been on an absolute tear the past few weeks. It's astounding how good this season has been. I'm almost sad that anyone has to even leave the house as the current configuration of characters has led to nothing but outrageous outbursts and nonsensical screaming, usually thanks to some dumb comment that's been misinterpreted ten times over.

Take, for example, the big blowout between Keesha, Libra, April, and Michelle. It all stemmed from a joke that Libra made at a "feast" that the house guests had won. Whether you love Libra or hate her, you can't deny that her joke was nothing more than just that - a joke. However, Michelle interpreted it as an attack on April and Keesha and perhaps the entire country. One thing led to another, and suddenly the lovey-dovey Feast of Dreams turned into an all out cat fight amongst the women. (Incidentally, the CBS show only showed a small portion of the silliness that transpired that night - which included, but was not limited to Michelle throwing pillows around the house and yelling at the top of her lungs.) It's honestly a shame that Libra or Keesha have to leave this week because I fear these brawls will never be the same.

Meanwhile, the ladies weren't the only ones making fools of themselves. Jerry ascended to the ranks of Sanctimonious Fool (an honor which seems to fall on at least one cast member every season). The old coot continued to go on and on about Dan hiding behind his cross, going so far as to call him "Judas" on multiple occasions. I don't think you need me to articulate why this logic is so flawed, but I will anyway. Jerry seems to have forgotten how on week one of the competition, he blatantly broke his word to Brian - so much so that he had to remove all his military garb when doing so. How was this different from Dan's actions. Jerry also noted how Dan vowed to give up his religion before betraying Jessie, but as far as I can tell, that deal was off the instance Jessie tried to get Dan nominated when Keisha was HOH. The point of this is that Jerry needs to shut his mouth (except for when he yells strange things like "BEEP BEEP!" "Hooonnnk!" or "SCREW YOU, PEOPLE!")

Anyway, onto last night's photocap...

"You know what? I fuckin' hate this ceiling! I never should have given it my word."

"I poured myself this cup of water, and I take full responsibility for it. Believe that."

"And you know what else? I fuckin' hate this fish tank behind me. Those fish are all so fuckin' fake all the time. They're probably fuckin' talking shit about me right now, fuckers."

"Look at my toe. It's such a fuckin' liar."

"Announcing those nominations to yous was hahhd. I sweah, I almost crapped my undahwears."

"Hey all yous. Gathah around. I got some new undahwears!"

"My name's April, and I know how to handle a casual moment."

"Comin' through with food. Hooonnnk!"

"I'm so wicked tiyad. If I don't get some rest soon, I'm gonna fall asleep in my undahwears."

"This fork hides behind the cross. It's a Judas fork. HOOONNNKK!!!"

"Just because Dan took off his cross doesn't mean he can break his word. It's totally arbitrary. And I can say this truthfully because I'm wearing my Marine hat."

"I bet if Tawm Brady sawr my tank top, he'd say, 'Check out that wicked crazy Portuguese chick.' Yeah, he'd get a few idears..."

"This game is so great. It just makes me want to STAB ALL OF YOU IN THE NECK! Hahahaha."

"There were so many onions in the Veto competition, my eyes were gushing watah. WATAH!!!"

"When I want to win something, I do whatever it takes to win - even if that means dressing up like Tweety Bird."

No caption needed.

"BEEP! BEEP! I'm not wearing any military gear; so I can lie to all you people now!"

"I try to be nice to the onions. I really do. But I just can't stand those motherfuckers! They're always doubting me!"

"Hmmm... I wonder if Ollie will DO ME in the onion patch..."

"This is really gonna get in the way of my womanizing..."

"I didn't win? Okay, now my feelings are hurt."

"I'm not gonna hide behind my cross in this game. Only my military gear."

"I want all of yous to look at my belly. See? No tan lines. That's because when I tan, I don't put on my undahwears."

"Hey yous. Pass the WATAH before I punch yous in the kissah!"

"MARY! ST. JOSEPH!!! We're feasting like Goldilocks. Like GoldiLOCKS!!!"

"I just want to say that I really like each and every one of you, and on that note, FUCK YOU ALL!"

"My name's April, and I know how to handle a pleasant evening around the Lazy Susan."

"Stawp! Stawp! I'm crappin' my undahwears!"

"Let me just say something: when you took off your hat just now? That hurt my feelings. My feelings were hurt."

"I wrote four times, and Oprah never responded not even ONCE! I don't have to tell you how badly my feelings were hurt. I mean, I went to Rice MOTHERFUCKING University!"

"I just want you to know that I take full responsibility for this hug."

"This has been a great chat and all, but April and I are scheduled to bone in the spa room; so I'm gonna get going."

"All this fighting is about that dumb joke? Really? Well, then I apologize. I should have remembered that April is unstable, Keesha is psycho, and Michelle doesn't understand comedy AT ALL."

"I'll say it again: I am not Milton Moorehead from Syosset, Lawng Island!"

"FUCK YOU, APRIL! You've been talking shit about me to the fish, and I KNOW IT!"

"I'M GONNA YELL BECAUSE ALL OF YOUS ARE YELLING TOO!"

"Wait a second. Are yous tellin' me that there were pigs feet at the feast and none of yous bothahed to tell me?"

"I think tonight I'm gonna have Ollie DO ME upside down. Yeah. That sounds fun."

"BEEP! BEEP! It's time for me to get on my high horse!"

"Damn, I wish I could be screwing three girls right now."

"Wow. Jerry's speech was crazy. And that's coming from ME. (And the voices in my head)."

It's Sunday night, which means after an interminable two day wait, CBS has blessed us with another episode of Big Brother. There wasn't anything particularly stunning about this latest installment, but it was fun and funny all the same - culminating in two laugh-out-loud segments focusing on first April's "pet" poodle Polly and then on Ollie's strange phobia of birds. The latter scene provided us with another golden nugget from Michelle, who noted that Ollie would have been screwed in the age of "dinosaahhs" as a pterodactyl would have most certainly swooped down and ate him. You know what else would have been terrifying? THE DINOSAURS.

Nevertheless, this first episode of Renny's reign featured all too little frantic screaming from her. In fact, the best we got was some strange wheezing, but I don't feel comfortable really making fun of that as it came in response to her seeing pictures of her deceased parents. Even Keesha kept her shrieking to a minimum, eschewing her weekly meltdown in favor of quiet googly eyes towards Memphis. Speaking of whom, Memphis has quietly positioned himself perfectly with all alliances in the house. Everyone seems to like him, but make no mistake about it: he's still on everyone's radar, especially after he won that car (whose prices seems to escalate every week) back on week one. If April goes this week, look for the target to go back on him (assuming it doesn't land on Renny and Keesha). Also, note the way Michelle has so quickly and deftly distanced herself from Jerry, Ollie, and April. Wasn't it just a week ago that they were all buddy-buddy? She may be crazy/Portuguese (much in the same way that Renny is a Babe/Mom), but she seems to know what she's doing.

Anyway, onto the photocap...

"Yay! I'm so happy I could just STAB YOU ALL IN THE EYE!!!"

"It's not that bad? Do you even REALIZE that there's a crow out there? A CROW!!!"

"Last night I had a dream about a parakeet. I was so scared, April. I was so scared."

"My name's April, and I know how to handle an unfavorable turn of events!"

"And I came here for you to DO ME."

"MARY! ST. JOSEPH!! I'm locked on Memphis. I'M LOCKED!!!"

"MARY! ST. JOSEPH!! I'm keeping my eye on him. My vision will be LOCKED! IT'S LOCKED!!!!"

"All yous remembah last week when I had the powaaahh? Now it's gone, and I wanna crap my undahwears."

"My name's Polly, and I know how to handle an aggressive game of monkey-in-the-middle!"

"MARY! ST. JOSEPH!! I've got Polly in a headlock. IT'S HEADLOCKED!!!"

"Please, April... before I die... just ask Ollie to... DO ME TOO!"

"April, you're my best friend, and that's scary to me - especially because you vaguely resemble a seagull."

"Ollie, you're like my best friend too, and I've always wanted to marry my best friend. So.... no pressure."

"Now DO ME."

"Man, being HOH is hard. I gotta put someone on the block. MARY! ST. JOSEPH!! IT'S A BLOCK!!!"

"I could get so many chicks with this bow tie. I'd totally womanize them."

"I have to wear this ridiculous outfit? SCREW YOU, PEOPLE! HOOoonnnk!!!"

"BLECH! The vile taste of liberalism!"

"I wish we wah in the age of dinosaahhs so a pterodactyl could swoop down and take me away from all yous. Then again, that would probably make me crap my undahwears."

"I thought this slop would go down easy, but it's betrayed me. It's JUDAS SLOP! HOOonnnkk!!!"

"I wanna take this slop into the back room and womanize it."

"If I have to eat another wicked cricket, I'm gonna crap my undahwears in front of all yous."

"I'm gonna write down instructions so that Ollie knows exactly how to DO ME."

"My name's April, and I know how to sacrifice my morals for a stupid food competition!"

"Sneak preview, Ollie.'"

"Sneak preview, April."

"Here's who I think should go up: there's this hummingbird that sometimes hovers near the pool, and I know it's up to no good..."

"I wish I knew how to stop being so AMAZINGLY NICE all the time..."

"I wonder if it's possible to womanize the nomination process..."

"Renny doesn't know it yet, but I'm totally gonna womanize her turban."

"So now you promise that when I take out the next key, a bird won't fly out? Like in that Albert Hitchcock movie?"

"If she puts me on the block, I'm gonna crap my undahweahs. Damn, I shoulda worn my leotahd."

"My name's April, and I... and I... and I can HANDLE... being... on... the block. Oh, Ollie DO ME RIGHT NOW BEFORE I BREAK DOWN!!!"