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SNSE returns!

A Bartholomew's recap of the first one for the Last Comic Standing challenge:






A summary of Something Partially Epic

It began in early September. Mafia players were foaming at the mouth for an innovative game to be hosted by a highly intelligent, funny, hard working host. Unfortunately for them, this was not it. Jessfrogger kept bugging people to play this game, and he was hyping it beyond belief. It turns out that the game would end up being a rather ordinary game with lackluster players and boring personalities. Reluctantly, 20 players signed on, most of which would quit or just not care. The twists would be humdrum, the challenges stolen from other games (one of which Mr. Jessfrogger was a part of, and one that he insists he was the best player in, when in truth R3L dominated every aspect of the game), and the length of time nearly unbearable. Three months later, and 5 players still remain. Epic in length, but not in anything else.

The first phase of the game began. It would eventually be known as the Naj era. A bunch of people stopped by the board, posting random shit like wanting showmances, being mediawhores, and wanting to quit the game right away, as evidenced by Fez.

Fez: We all have lives, and my e-celebrity can grow at a later date.

The first challenge involved playing games and sending in your scores. About half of the players were immune the first vote, and this crap was kept up until about 7 players were left. People won gold stars and stuff. The first elimination occured at Boot Camp, where Tyran found himself kicked out with the most votes.

Tyran: I just got back from a long drive, I don't need this shit.

After debating all of his options, Tyran chose to remove Fez as well.

At this point, the game is going at a decent pace, and running smoothly, however:

Jessfrogger: Naj, you're Nike.

Naj: No, I'm not.

Jess: Yes, you are.

Naj: No, I'm not.

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Jessfrogger: Okay, Nike is out.

So Nike left the game. This caused a whole lot of turmoil in the game, and the players became unruly. Several threatened to quit, but most of them were insignificant anyway. Cg quit, and came back. So did Naj. Cindi quit too. Cg quit and came back again. Gene quit at some point, and actually stayed gone. Tyran, I don't believe, was even back in the game at the time, but he quit. Bjtonic and Greecer were booted at some point, as well. They won some other games, but they were terrible in these. Tyran, along with DC, entered the game.

Nomi: Yay!

DC: Naj must go.

Jessfrogger went somewhere for a week, and came back. Around this time, DC and her cronies put all of their focus into getting rid of the puppet master, Naj. It was a war on the Something Epic board. But when the votes came in, Naj was eliminated.

Nich: Gotcha.

Naj: I didn't even try this game! I just went along with other people and acted mean to everyone!

DC: Naj must go.

Cindi and Bilkis would soon follow. Two more players that didn't give a shit about the game. Around this time people started complaining about how long the game was taking, but nothing really happened. It should be noted that around this time, the game became so fucking dull that even the good players wanted to leave. Nich got the boot next.

Nich: Yay, thanks for the liberation.

Whatever the fuck that means. A mole quiz was held next.

DC: Tyran, if you don't leave with me, I swear on my fucking Jewfro, I will never speak to you again as long as I live.

Tyran: Yes, ma'am.

So they both were removed from the game. Nich came back, and got shit-canned again. The good news for him, is that he was now the first juror that would determine the winner of this god-awful game.

Nich: I achieved my goal.

Skilled players look down on this type of attitude, as it's silly to just try and shoot for a jury spot. Of course, that was what a person with common sense would assume that he meant when he said that, but the clown's goal was to not let Naj and Bilkis back in! It just adds more water to the theory that Nich is possibly mentally handicapped.

Teams were split up for the next round. Nomi and Cg joined Nich on the jury. Nothing more to say about this vote. I'd wager that those two were the two least interesting players to follow in EZ game history. Did they even try to play? I thought this game would
be Epic. How many piles of cow shit do you have to sling out the window before you get down to the talented players? For the SE game, it would be a lot more to shit to get rid of (and there are still a few piles left, as we shall soon see).

The next vote would be Grefuck getting the axe. He did well in challenges, but he was a terrible liar. You could PM him, tell him that we should vote out anybody, and his response would be: kk. What a fucking loser. The good news is, it gives him more time to
tell all those frat stories.

Grefuck: Dude, I was at a party the other night, and a freaking lion got into the house!

Mafia person: No way!

Grefuck: Yes way! And then I jumped off a building like Spiderman! And lived to tell the
tale!

The following vote saw everybody's favorite player, LUV, get booted. Ustra didn't vote on time, and LUV joined the jury. His original plan was to have an "all-girl" alliance make it to the end (Which is funny because he's a 300 pound fat ugly guy who used to post under the name SurvivorBryan at FGC, there is proof of this). So much for that alliance.

LUV: Jib, YOU'RE an AIDS ridden BITCH. GNG, you're a fucking WHORE who SHOULD die, and you're UGLY, and your KIDS smell like poop, AND I hate you.

Highwind, who had been sitting on his gold star and not been doing much else in the game, got eliminated by an intense game of fire/water/wood, by a score of 2-1-3 after 7 rounds (Round 4 apparently does not exist in SE and therefore was not counted). This left us with 5 players. Well, really, 4 ham and eggers, and one all star master strategist. Let's
look over the remaining players briefly:

Ustra - Tries hard in challenges.

Willydipshit - Recently, he was mad because Naj wasn't rooting for him to win in the game. The truth is, Willy, you have been so useless, that he just forgot you were in it. As Gene said a while ago, YOU probably aren't even rooting for yourself to win.

GNG - Self voted a bunch of times.

Jibtard - After Grefuck left, he tried to play both sides, but did a terrible job of it. He then gets mad because everyone found out about it. A fucking idiot if there ever was one.

A Bart - Far and away the best player. A master strategist.

There you have it. Stayed tuned to see who will win STWHUTBEITBBDNFTOILI, or:
Something that was hyped up to be epic in the beginning, but did not follow through on its lofty ideals.

In conclusion, the game as a whole is a joke. A perfect topic for a humor-based challenge.