Apeshit ranks the characters of Snatch in Clubs that Suck. No, Really. Forum

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Apeshit ranks the characters of Snatch

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Bobby Jon goes apeshit

Apeshit ranks the characters of Snatch

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Posts: 1437

(11/02/08 12:46 PM)

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(I hope someone here has actually seen the movie or else this ranking will be a massive fail)

I love Snatch. Its one of my favourite films of all time. Its very stylised filled with dark humor and fake accents (Sucks loves them, right?). The characters are completely over the top, played by excellent actors such as Benicio Del Toro, Brad Pitt, Dennis Farina, Vinnie "Fucking" Jones and that dude from the Transporter movies, Jason Statham.

So here are the contenders...

The picture is actually missing a few characters who didn't get they're "freeze frame intro shot" in the beginning of the movie. The complete list as follows:

Character	Actor
Turkish	Jason Statham
Tommy	Stephen Graham
Gorgeous George	Adam Fogerty
Mickey O'Neill	Brad Pitt
Boris The Blade aka The Bullet Dodger	Rade Šerbedžija
Sol/Solomon	Lennie James
Vinnie/Vincent	Robbie Gee
Tyrone	Ade
Douglas "Doug The Head" Denovitz	Mike Reid
Abraham "Cousin Avi" Denovitz	Dennis Farina
Frankie "Four-Fingers"	Benicio del Toro
Bullet Tooth Tony	Vinnie Jones
Brick Top Polford	Alan Ford
Alex and Susi aka The Twins	Nikki and Teena Collins
Rosebud	Sam Douglas

Madhackrviper

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Posts: 2901

(11/02/08 12:49 PM)

Boris the Blade ftw!

survivorisdestiny

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Posts: 1314

(11/02/08 08:11 PM)

Registered User

This movie is the shit! Definitely on my top ten list.
After watching it three times, I think that cousin Avi is the most entertaining character. With possibly the most classic line, "Shut up and sit down you big bald fuck!" Also, his comments about dogs, umbrellas, getting "the chop" and London make him the funniest of all. Still, I can see arguments for pretty much any character, Avi is just my personal favorite.
Snatch fans, are you stoked for Rocknrolla!?

Bobby Jon goes apeshit

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Posts: 1439

(11/03/08 09:37 AM)

Survivor Phoenix has posted a clue

"It tells a story. V is for Victory"

Did I just spoil the final six? Or did I just copy the first pic found with Google?

Bobby Jon goes apeshit

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Posts: 1442

(11/03/08 02:28 PM)

I knew I shouldn't have started a ranking thread the same day as Louie. Oh well, might as well get this show on the road...

Honorable mention: The Dog (portrayed...by the dog)

Fuck Lassie. This dog swallowed a squee toy AND a 86 carat diamond. It also must have had some giant brass ones to be comfortable enough in its manhood to wear one of those ridiculous neck things they put on dogs that look like freakin NASA satellite disks. So kudos to you dog.

15. Gorgeous George (portrayed by Adam Fogerty)

What kind of a name is Gorgeous George...anyway, George was the boxer Turkish and Tommy coached, who was supposed to be having a unlicensed boxing match against one of Brick Tops guys. That didn't exactly workout. See...Turkish wanted a new caravan from where to run his business (he wasnt sure about the color of the old one).

Obviously, caravans = gypsies. So he sent Tommy and George to the gypsy camp to pick up a caravan.

And obviously, the gypsies screwed them out of they're money which led to an epic fight between gypsy leader Mickey...and George. And since George isn't the one on the DVD cover you can imagine who came out victories.

He was all talk and no action. Sure, he landed a couple of good hits on Mickey during they're fight. But Mickey took em all like the champ he was and proceeded to end Georges boxing career with a single punch. I did like his short cameo towards the end where he is seen playing poker with Turkish and Tommy and his teeth and jaw is held together by giant braces.

survivortony2007

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Posts: 5

(07/04/09 08:04 AM)

never saw this film

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Apeshit ranks the characters of Snatch

Apeshit ranks the characters of Snatch