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I am between a rock and a hard place. I am 39 and have been unemployed for a while. I am living at home and my father resents me. He doesn't think I am doing enough to find a job and screams at me sometimes for gettng up too late. It is worse now that my mother lost her nursing job that she's had for 22 years. My father has a good pension and social security. When my mother was working they saved his money. They are worth $500,000 and are comfortible. None of this matters to my father, who is always crying poverty.

Added to this is the fact that my boyfriend wants me to move in with him. My father does not approve of my relationship and has threatened to disown me because of it. I used to be engaged to this man, but called it off because he and I want different things out of life. He is 15 years older than me and a drunk. He's also hung up on his ex-wife. If we get married I can give up on the thoughts of having children because his ex-wife made him get snipped after their younger son was born. His kids are grown and he says that he doesn't want to have any more. Also, I am Catholic and he can't marry me in the church because he married his ex in the church.

I actually want to break up with my boyfriend but part of me wants to move in with him to escape my father. I no longer care if I am disowned because I hate my father and don't care if I ever see him again. I also don't think I would ever see his money either as it will probably be used up in my parents's old age when they start to have health problems. I am worried aboout my mother though. I know if I move out I won't be able to go back if things don't work out with my boyfriend, but I can't stay where I am either. I am looking for a job and that's what I really want: to have a job and support myself. I don't know what to do.