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1) If Ben's being horrible to people was a criteria for whether he was likable or not, Jeff's already got all the proof he needs. Ben was clearly a bastard. I don't know what Jeff means. But it wasn't that he didn't see enough of Ben to determine whether he was creepy or not. You could tell from a photo of Ben that he's creepy. So I don't think this indicates Ben goes home soon.

2) I actually don't get this Coach vs. Russell distinction entirely. It seems like nostalgia. Russell is actually sort of fascinating, even though he's a sadist. He's playing the game in such a kamikaze way. I'm reluctant to see him dominate the season, but that's only partially because he's a sociopath. Really, it's because I need a break after the guy we had last season. Coach is single handedly responsible for making Tocantins my third least favorite season of all time, behind such losing scratch tickets as Thailand, All Stars and The Cook Islands. He wasn't having fun. He was just abusive.

3) Why can't the producers remember that what made villains like Boston Rob, Richard Hatch and Johnny Fairplay great television was that they had a sense of humor about themselves? They were basically sane and self-aware, even likable. They seldom reduced people to !#@+!. They just loved to make witty cracks about people behind their backs and cause mischief in the game. It was fun for them and fun for us.

You're being a nostalgic old timer. A fat naked gay guy with a spear isn't a huge character? Like, Rich wasn't synonymous with Survivor? Or what about the crusty old Navy Seal with the memory issues ("I dunno!") who doesn't like Perry Homo or Frank Snotgrass? That isn't a weird dude on the level that Shambo's weird? Or The Robfather? Or Big Tom, who speaks in bizarre colloquialisms and gets drunk until he can no longer be understood? Didn't Colby and Elisabeth get squeeky clean edits along the lines of Sugar and Stephanie? Of course they did. It just felt different for all of us because it was new and we were ten years younger.

The majority of the characters then, as now, were not cartoon characters. Only one or two out of the Samoa cast is a super villain or hero per se, and that's always been more or less the balance. I have major beefs with the show. They're casting people who have serious mental health issues. They're literally dangerous. Angry and abusive brutes are replacing sarcastic but basically light hearted schemers as the villains. First Shane, then Rocky, then Coach, then Ben and Russell.

I actually thought E1 of this season improved on one of my bigger beefs, which is the lack of character development. Just a little bit about who these people are and where they come from makes a big difference in how I feel about them. I'd like more but we got a taste with Shambo, Jaison, Betsy and Russell in particular.

If you're jaded, that's understandable. But see it for what it is. Cause the way you're remembering the old show just isn't accurate.

Please excuse me. I can be passionate or concise but I suck it being both at once. If that's how you feel about it then good on you. But sorry. I totally reject the notion that the people on the show aren't 'real.' Are they made out of plastic? Were they drawn with ink? They may not be average, but Richard Hatch wasn't average. The average American citizen is not a fat gay megalomaniacal nudist. Rich was really unique, just like Rupert. And much like Rupert, that's crucial to why he became a celebrity. A stronger argument would be that contestants today are too mactory. But Joel? Jenna? Greg? Colleen? Stacey? Gervase? They were mactory and Russell ain't exactly a beauty queen (not to mention Shambo, Betsy, Dave, etc.)

Really the problem is the editing and photography. The original seasons were less glossy looking and they did a better job of grounding the contestants in their real world roles. The marketing sold their status as Average Americans hard, and it showed more of their emotional bonds. You'll never hear me argue with about about that. Strategy was always a part of it but the editors are now putting the em-PHA-sis on the wrong syl-ABLE.

As for rehearsing the lines? Again, no. If I'm Sean Kenniff and I'm sitting in a row boat for six hours with Dirk (and you know how he's Mister Personality) I'm spending a lot of time mentally rehearsing my confessional to make it funny. Because what else am I going to think about? The news of the day? I don't have a clue what the fuck's going on in the world. I might as well think about the TV show I'm starring on. People who agreed to have their lives filmed have always - ALWAYS - liked the idea of being TV characters. Rudy wanted to impress the old timers down at the Navy yard. It's definitional, isn't it?

The real difference isn't even recruiting. They've had some good recuits. It's that people are now conveying an actual contempt for doing the show. Amber Brkich was a Wal-Mart employee who applied because she had no other plans. But she was excited about doing it. You hear these people today? "Yeah, well, I turned them down. Had no interest. They called and begged. It was pathetic. Finally I gave in. The short film I was going to star in fell through." Fuck that in the ass. Really. Fuck that. In the ass. That DOES hurt the show. I just don't think you're pointing at the specific problems so much as waving your hands broadly in nostalgic disgust.

The Emmys should be disbanded. The people who vote on them don't even watch television. It would be like if the Baseball Writers Association gave the MVP to Ken Griffey Jr. this year because they liked him in 1995. I'm not saying The Oscars always get it right (WTF do you mean Frost/Nixon got Picture and Director noms over The Dark Knight?) But their logic is consistent. They'll usually award a great biopic over a good one. Survivor has to be laughing incredulously about The Amazing Race right now. Anyway, yes, more R&D.